Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Gobble You Up!

The Sunday afternoon while Dad was here, we went to Strines for lunch. There, while trying to impress upon Maia the importance of not yelping and shrieking while we were waiting for our dinner, Papi told her a tale inspired by the menu. This was The Great and Gory tale of the Giant Yorkshire Pudding who lived in a shed at the bottom of the pub garden. We had to be careful not to make too much noise, as we didn't want to wake him up, because then he would eat us all up! (And to think I was debating the morals of telling Maia about Father Christmas two months ago. Sheesh.)

When we were playing later with the cool Zoibs clicky things that Papi bought for Maia, somehow The Giant Yorkshire Pudding (from now on, known as TGYP) made an appearance. I am not sure at which point Maia decided that Papi was TGYP, nor how she came to the conclusion that they best way of dealing with the TGYP was to pour gravy over him (so he went all floppy and couldn't catch her) but that is where we were. The clicky things abandoned, we played a very odd game of Lady Bringing Food and Chief Gravy Pourer (Maia), The Giant Yorkshire Pudding (Papi) and The Lady Trying Not to Collapse with Mirth in the Corner (me).

Every time Maia would retreat to get more gravy, Papi would roar and make gobbley noises. Maia would shriek with terrified delight and rush over and pour over a jug of imaginary gravy to incapacitate TGYP.

All very odd. And very, very funny.

Puppeteer Papi

Maia's puppet theatre was a joint present from Papi, Noonah, Pat and I, and she LOVES it. It is a very interactive toy - she won't just go and play with it on her own, as she is acutely aware of the need for a Story Teller, a Puppet Person and a Watcher. And, no, they cannot all be one and the same person.

While Papi was here, she decided that we would play Puppets. So we relocated to the front room with cups of tea, and she arranged us for the first show. Papi was The Watcher, she was the Story Teller, and I was the Puppet Person. She spun a story about Scaly MacBeal and the Scary Wolf and The Grandmother who scared them both away, driving the narrative with loud 'And SUDDENLYs' and stage whispered instructions to me as to who to bring up next.

We all had a go at being the Story Teller, the Watcher and the Puppeteer. I loved watching Maia play. She gets really involved in the whole process. She is enthusiastic, stays in character has NO stage fright at all. I can smell the greasepaint already...

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Dancin' ... REALLY Dancin'

Maia joined Jasmine and Callum for their Wednesday afternoon dancing class this week. She LOVED it.

She was complimented on her skipping by Miss Janet (and it was mighty fine, I have to say, if not the epitome of gracefulness. Think little tiny skipping hefalump). She knew all about Good Toes and Naughty Toes, and when she wasn't quite sure what to do, Jasmine was very keen to show her the ropes.

In fact, Jasmine was really pretective of her. She fended off those who had designs on getting Maia to be their Galloping-Across-the-Room partner. For such a slight little thing, she is pretty fierce.

Afterwards Maia asked if we could come again, and wanted to go right out and buy some Ballet Shoes.

"I need them, Mummy, so I can do dancing all the time."

So I think she enjoyed it...

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Horsing Around

My dad was here this weekend. It was great to have him here for a while, as he usually has to fly over, dash up, spend a few hours here, zoom back down, fly out again. All in the blink of an eye.

This time, he is over for a week and a bit, so he was able to spend the weekend pottering and playing with Miss Maia.

We went for a walk in the countryside, where Maia showed him a more surreal side to her personality by introducing him to the Knock Knock Game. This is a game whereby someone (usually an adult, at least at first) hides behind a Big Tree. Maia then says 'Knock Knock' and the adult then answers in the style of an animal. For some reason, she usually asks about sausages...

Anyway, Papi decided that for his turn, he would be A Horse.

'Knock Knock' Maia said

'Neigh!' said Papi

'Have you got any sausages?' Maia said

'Nay!' said Papi ...Nay as in No, but also Nay as in Neigh. Geddit? Maia did not.

So she peered round the tree. 'I said, Have You Got Any Sausages?' she said, loudly and a bit slower.

'Nay!'Papi replied, trying not to laugh.

An exasperated look crossed her face. She peered further round the tree and said very loudly, and very slowly 'HAVE YOU GOT ANY SAUSAGES??'

This was all too much for Papi, who scooted out from behind the tree and said that it was probably time to carry on with our walk.

Now, horses are supposed to be pretty intelligent creatures, but somehow I think that Maia's impression of them will always be that they are not terribly smart.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

New Finn, New Blog

When I was a kid, Jennifer Roberts (now Marbury) and I were inseparable. When we were about 7, we used to make 'giggle juice' out of anything and everything we could find in the cupboard and force my brother to drink it (sorry Alec).

We used to play for hours and hours in my house, her house, her grandmother Omi's house, various swimming pools and beaches all over Nassau and Rose Island. Once, on a sleep-over at her house, we thought it would be a good idea to sleep in the hammock on the porch. I don't think I have ever had a more uncomfortable night's sleep in my life. Especially since we gave up on the hammock and transferred to the waterbed. Ugh. Fun though...

Anyway, Jen and I were best buds growing up. She went to Scotland, I went to England, she went back to Nassau then off to Rhode Island (School of Design, no less), I stayed in England blah blah blah...and so it was that we have been out of touch for a while. Couple of emails have been back-and-forthing over the past few years but now Jen and her husband Roger have just had a baby - Finn Benjamin Roberts Marbury - and they are blogging about it here: Baby Marbury

Babies and Blogging - Everyone is doing it!

:)

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

"George Is Not My Favourite"

Well, and so it is. The swings and roundabouts of toddler favourites have swung around and knocked George off his perch.

George is not longer Maia's Favourite.

Apparently, he won't let Maia be MAIA. He wants her to be Tinkerbell all the time, or Princess Leeya (she won't have it that you pronounce it 'Lay-ya'). He, meanwhile, insists on being Spiderman, or Luke Skywalker.

Maia just wants to be Maia. George will be Favourite No More. Isabel Beginty - come on down!

Monday, February 13, 2006

Callum, Jasmine and Maia Go Bear Hunting

We went over to Naomi's house this Saturday. Maia, Jasmine and Callum play really well together, leaving plenty time for Naomi and I to chat over lots of cups of tea.

All through lunchtime we had been talking about what kind of bear we would like to find on our Walk In The Woods. Jasmine wanted a pink one, Maia wanted a lilac one, I wanted a stripy one, Naomi a fluffy one, Callum a white one and Ian a grey one. In the end we decided we would look for a fluffy pink, white, lilac and grey striped bear. In Rotherham.

We bundled up warm, spent ages finding all the coats and hats and mitts we would need - then ages taking them all off again so that we could all have a pee. Finally we were off!

The walk to the woods took us along a busy road, so we spent a while sorting out Hand Holding. Gotta hold hands, and there is obviously Toddler Status bound up in who holds which parent's hands. Obviously, the value of holding the hand of a parent that doesn't belong to you is greater than holding one that does. Until, of course, you realise that someone else is holding your Mummy's hand, and then it becomes desirable again. So we swopped about a bit along the way.

We spent a very enjoyable hour or so leaf kicking, dog chasing, log balancing, shrieking, walking-like-a-mousing, stomping, running and laying in the leaves and looking up at the sky. Maia had an al fresco pee behind a tree (taking no chances, I stripped her bottom half completely, so she had a bit of a cold bum for that bit). And of course, bear hunting.

The kids were shattered by the time we finally made it back, and the brief bout of tiredness-induced moaning quickly disappeared as soon as the magic words 'Hot Chocolate' were mentioned.

We had tea, dunked the kids in the bath and drove home tired and happy. A really good day. Despite the lack of fluffy pink, white, lilac and grey striped bears.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Nits Nits Nits

Not on us, but there was a rather snotty note that got handed out at school today saying:

'We have noticed that a number of children in the Warren room have live headlice. Would you please comb your child's hair tonight.' Accompanying this wristslap was a handout about how to look for headlice, what they look like, and how to get rid of them.

So, of course I zoomed home as fast as I could

'Oh god, PLEASE let me not have missed them, PLEASE let her not be one of the ones with things crawling about on her head! icky icky icky!'

All the while, I was trying to ease Maia gently into the possibility that we might have to have a bath in the afternoon! And wash her hair with Special Shampoo. She suggested it was to get rid of the spiders, so I guess there are some Warren Room Chinese-whispers going on.

I spent a good few minutes poring over her head (having bribed her to sit still by letting her eat some jelly that they had made in class today) making sure she really REALLY didn't have nits. I was worried that I might not see them, but if they can notice them at school when there are 15 kids in the class, I am sure I wouldn't miss them standing 5 cm from Maia's skull.

Will be doing regular combing from here on in. If there are loads of the little buggers hopping about, we will have to be vigilant. I just hope somehow, we escape them. Yuck!

Saturday, February 04, 2006

Pat Gets Ordained

Maia and Pat did some face-painting this afternoon. This mostly involved Pat painting a butterfly on Maia, then taking it off because it made her cheeks hurt. They agreed that face-painting shouldn't stop just because her cheeks hurt, and wouldn't Daddy like to have some face-paint too?

She was obviously feeling Most Artistic and, by the time I arrived, had created an amazing tableau of blues, yellows and reds marching across Pat's face. She immediately informed me that she was half a butterfly (all that remained was the black outline) and that Daddy was a 'Shepherd Monk'.

Eh?

We think she might have meant chipmunk, but I like the idea of a Shepherd Monk better.

Patrick Seamus Francis Cull, of The Ancient Order of Those Who Washed Their Socks By Night...

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Little Grey Cloud

Maia is still a bit grizzly and whiney at the moment, which is quite hard to deal with. I am not sure what is prompting it. She is normally pretty cheery, and as whining doesn't get rewarded, she is getting frustrated when she doesn't get her way.

Anyway, we were in the car, coming back from dropping off the vacuum cleaner to be fixed (it is all about the glamour, here) when Maia starts grizzling over something or other in the back seat. I say "That is enough Maia, no grizzling please. If you talk to me in a Big Voice I can help you." and then do my best to ignore the grizzles and wait for the Big Voice, and an explanation of what is bugging her.

She moans and half cries for a bit, and then starts mournfully singing

"red...(sniff) and yellow...and pink (sniff sniff) and blue..." all in this Little Grey Cloud Raining on Eeyore voice.

Mum and I are doing our very best not to burst out laughing. I sneak a look at her. She catches me looking and starts to sing more cheerfully. Once she is done, I tell her that she is like a little Grey Cloud singing the Rainbow Song, and that we should all sing it like Sunshine. So we belt out a verse of I Can Sing A Rainbow that takes us home.

I don't want to deny her the right to let us know that she feels grotty - we all feel like crap at times. I also don't want to force her to repress genuine feelings and display false emotions to make us feel better. But God DAMN, I want her to stop whining... Answers on a Postcard, please.

Inventive Use of Everyday Objects, Number 324

I was going to a fancy dress party on Saturday, and collected a whole load of alternative costume bits and bobs on my bed to assemble into Something Creative. The theme was Enchanted Forest, and I was either going as a woodland fairy-type thing (in green and brown) or a Narnia-esque Ice Queen. In the end I went for the green and brown, twisted ivy in my hair and donned lots of green make-up.

But not before I had bought some white feathery hairsticks that looked like little mini feather-dusters that had caught a particularly glittery spiderweb. Maia was sitting on my bed 'helping' me get ready when she chanced upon these.

"Oooh, Mummy! Did you buy these as a present for me?"

"Not originally - I was going to put them in my hair to be a snow queen, but I don't need them now, so you can have them if you would like them."

She hopped off the bed, clutching her prize. Standing by the bed she looked intently at the hairsticks, and then at me.

"Look, Mummy! They are for sweeping toes!"

And she amused herself for the rest of the time it took to apply my makeup by sweeping my toes, her toes, and Bear's toes.

Monday, January 30, 2006

Siren Songs

Dance for your Daddy, my little lovey
Dance for your Daddy, my little lamb
Ye shall have a fishie, on a little dishie
Ye shall have a fishie, when the bo-at comes in


Maia is entranced by this song. She gets a dopey expression on her face and thinks it is wonderful.

On the other hand, Duelling Banjos makes her run around the kitchen table as fast as she can, giggling like a banshee. Talk about mood music...

Maia and The Monkey

When I was a kid and staying with my Dad, we all had a nemesis. Obviously, we were wonderfully behaved ANGELS, so anything rude, naughty, messy or dangerous we did was carried out by these evil twins. They were named after our backwards names, so mine was Acire (AK-ee-ray), Gen was Eveiveneg (EH-veh-nedge), Jono was Nahtanhoj (NAT-ah-noj) and Alec's was Cela (Keh-Lah).

Maia's nemesis is The Monkey.

When she is being whiney, or a ratbag or grumpy, Pat looks at her in surprise and says "Is that The Monkey?? What have you done with Maia?!?" It usually gives her an excuse to snap out of her icky mood and return to her sunny self.

Although I do fear we are setting her up for trouble in later life...

"Honestly, Ossifer, it wasn't me...it was The Monkey"

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Dramatic License

When Maia is being told a story, and she doesn't think the drama is going along at a cracking enough pace, she has a great way of moving the action on. She interrupts with an enthusiastic "And SUDDENLY..." and the person telling the story then has to introduce a wolf, or a whale, or something large and dramatic and of greater interest...

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Kassy's Return

Kassy is back! I am sure you will have heard the yelps and screams and joyous noises from where you are...

Skoolz

I filled in Maia's school choice form today. We had to choose three. She will probably be starting in January 2008 - the next intake after her 5th birthday, which means that I had been feeling very smug about going to see schools AGES ago and getting everything sorted so far in advance.

This smugness soon dissipated when I realised that the deadline had sneaked up on me, and that we had to do it by the end of this month. I don't think it is first-come, first-served though, so all those super-organised parents who did this 3 years ago don't get a better place. Ha!

Anyway, our first choice is Carfield School, which is the school directly behind our house. It is a great old Victorian building, and it was crammed with the children's art and crafts. Lovely feel to the place. We have had the advantage of being able to peer over the wall and see how playtime was supervised, and (apart from one kind of shouty man) they all play nicely, no huge fights or bundles. At least in the back playground that backs onto our house, that is...

The other schools we put down were Meersbrook Bank School, across the park from us, and Ann's Grove Primary which is a bit further into Heeley. Ann's Grove is moving into a fabulous new building, all built to sustainable design principles and across from Heeley city farm (and they have a wind turbine! Hurrah!) However, if she gets sent to Ann's Grove, we are going private - the results are DREADFUL and it seems to have a very difficult and transient population as a catchment. Cool building, tho.

Anyway, the first thing they look at for places is siblings of existing kids, and then the next criteria is proximity to the school. As we can swing a rope ladder over the fence to Carfield and get her to class on time, I think we are well in. But I will let you know.

Here is the website if you fancy a gander...http://www.carfieldprimary.org.uk/

Monday, January 16, 2006

Reluctant Miss Maia

Well, Maia has moved up into the Warren room at nursery, and she is not actually properly settled yet. She has changed teachers - Mrs Hunt has stayed with the Sunshine class - and she is now with Mrs Cross.

She seems to think that Mrs Cross is nice (and I think the questions I asked her were only slightly leading, your Honour) but she is expressing relucance to go to school at the moment.

Nothing major, we have not yet had to pick her up and manhandle her into the classroom. Nor is she refusing to get dressed to go to school, sabotaging the trip by hiding the car keys or phoning in bomb scares to the school. But she is a smart girl, so if she really doesn't want to go, I expect to be seeing some crafty tricks soon...

Do Nit Panic

OK, so maybe she doesn't have nits. I am very confused.

When I combed her hair with the free comb, there were little white bits (one or two...) but there don't seem to be any more. Maybe it was just general fluff and stuff that was caught in her locks.

Or maybe they are hiding. As well they should...dare to be on MY baby!

Friday, January 13, 2006

Name-Dropping

I bought Maia some cool bath crayons for Christmas, and since then, a good portion of each bathtime is spent scribbling away on the sides of the bath.

She can now recognise everybody's name, and dah Dah DAH DAH! write her own name.

A genius in her own bathtub!

Nits and Crosses

Ugh.

We got given a nit comb at school this week, by Mrs Cross, Maia's new teacher. I thought it was a marketing thing "Here! Have a comb!"...Until we used it, and discovered a couple of little tiny white eggs. And now I am all itchy.

I don't want to freak Maia out, so I have been talking in VERY general terms about getting some Special Shampoo and changing her pillow. We spent a while in the bath, wet-combing her hair and she seemed distracted enough by the bath crayons not to ask too many questions.

I wonder if she would be freaked out, at all. Probably not. She does tend to take things in her stride, but then she has never had critters living in her hair before.

S'cuse me - must go buy some Super Strength GETTHEMOFFME Shampoo.