Ladies and Gentlemen, MMJ has a phobia.
Maia is terrified of Clowns. We discovered this at the weekend, when we had two birthday parties to attend. The first was for Olivia, and was held in a Church Hall.
Andy the Clown, a pretty inoffensive example of Clowns That Entertain Children (or should that be ironic-hand-quotation-marks "Entertain"?) was doing his shouty, bewigged thing on the stage.
Maia took one look and went and hid in the coats. Not as in "oooh, look at me, I am being funny" hiding, either. Proper "I am NOT going in there" hiding.
Took us 15 minutes of sitting by the coats to get to the door and it was another 20 before she left my side. She started to warm up to him when his wig slipped a little and she could see that the red shaggy look he was sporting wasn't his real hair (even though I had been telling her that, she obviously needed to see it for herself). Then she watched the magic show and was ok with him. That is, until he brought out a trick that involved pictures of other clowns. Then she was off again.
It was really unsettling to see Maia like that - she has always been so independent. I have never spent the first part of a party with her clinging to my legs.
Then again, clowns are pretty scary. It is not like she is scared of something completely innocuous like postmen, or leaves, or supermarket trolleys.
If you ask me, it is perfectly reasonable to be wary of clowns. If only because they ain't funny.
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Noonah writes "Baby sitting - just who is in charge here?"
One evening last week, Erica and Pat set off for a Maia-free evening, leaving me in charge at home. Maia, however, had other ideas.
She said goodbye to Mummy and Daddy at the front door and waved and blew kisses until they were safely in the car. Then she firmly shut the door, looked me straight in the eye and said, in a very determined tone, "Now we can have a feast in the dark."
Somewhat taken aback, I burbled "Feast in the dark? But we've had supper..."
It was definitely bath-and-bed time. It soon became very clear that I was not going to get away with hurrying her upstairs for ablutions and slumber right away. So, since grandmas are allowed to spoil a little out of sight of the parents, we set off to the kitchen to prepare for a Feast in the Dark.
Maia announced that she wanted Food. What food? "Feast Food" she replied in a manner which left me in no doubt that she had suddenly realised she was dealing with a complete idiot. So, under Maia's direction, we collected Feast Food - sliced bananas, sliced oranges, small squares of marmite on toast, milk and a glass of water each.
We took our Feast Food into the front room and turned out all the lights and sat in front of the fire and ate our feast.
Damn but the kid has some great ideas!
She said goodbye to Mummy and Daddy at the front door and waved and blew kisses until they were safely in the car. Then she firmly shut the door, looked me straight in the eye and said, in a very determined tone, "Now we can have a feast in the dark."
Somewhat taken aback, I burbled "Feast in the dark? But we've had supper..."
It was definitely bath-and-bed time. It soon became very clear that I was not going to get away with hurrying her upstairs for ablutions and slumber right away. So, since grandmas are allowed to spoil a little out of sight of the parents, we set off to the kitchen to prepare for a Feast in the Dark.
Maia announced that she wanted Food. What food? "Feast Food" she replied in a manner which left me in no doubt that she had suddenly realised she was dealing with a complete idiot. So, under Maia's direction, we collected Feast Food - sliced bananas, sliced oranges, small squares of marmite on toast, milk and a glass of water each.
We took our Feast Food into the front room and turned out all the lights and sat in front of the fire and ate our feast.
Damn but the kid has some great ideas!
Tuesday, November 07, 2006
Fireworks Night
The view from out the back of our house is great. Sheffield, like Rome (and erm, Prague and lots of other place) is built on seven hills. We look out over a lot of them. Can't be arsed to count how many as I am always distracted by looking at the clouds, or marvelling that we are pretty much in the city centre and yet it is so green. Anyway...
Bonfire Night, we went to Isabel Berginty's house for food and drink and fireworks and all had a lovely time. Paula and I got ever so slightly freaked out tho, as the kids played really well upstairs, and came downstairs all in their own clothes. Very rare and notable occasion. Hence my noting it.
Anyway, we got back home to see that our position on top of hill number 1 was affording us a great view of everyone else's fireworks, all for free! Also got a (destruction-free) sense of what it might be like to live in an active warzone - explosions going off all around, and the smell of cordite hanging heavy in the air.
Maia and I sat upstairs in the back bedroom with the lights off, oohing and aaaahing at the pretty sparkles. Pat came in for a bit but then, deciding that fireworks are like flying a kite for him (fun idea, boring in practice) left us to it.
We agreed that our most favourists were the "'splodey ones with dust" followed by the ones that were pink and purple. A sparkling night...
Bonfire Night, we went to Isabel Berginty's house for food and drink and fireworks and all had a lovely time. Paula and I got ever so slightly freaked out tho, as the kids played really well upstairs, and came downstairs all in their own clothes. Very rare and notable occasion. Hence my noting it.
Anyway, we got back home to see that our position on top of hill number 1 was affording us a great view of everyone else's fireworks, all for free! Also got a (destruction-free) sense of what it might be like to live in an active warzone - explosions going off all around, and the smell of cordite hanging heavy in the air.
Maia and I sat upstairs in the back bedroom with the lights off, oohing and aaaahing at the pretty sparkles. Pat came in for a bit but then, deciding that fireworks are like flying a kite for him (fun idea, boring in practice) left us to it.
We agreed that our most favourists were the "'splodey ones with dust" followed by the ones that were pink and purple. A sparkling night...
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
Bangfires and Skelingtons
Maia was invited to go trick or treating round at Isabel Berginty's house yesterday. There was a little gang...George "I am not George, I am a monster!", Isabel, who was a bat/spidergirl/witch, David (Isabel's younger brother) who was a batmonster, and Maia, who went as a pink and red witchfairy.
They were all doing fine, going from house to house and stocking up on sugary booty until...some overly enthusiastic 10 year olds jumped out at them. They had been lying face down on the pavement, and when the group approached, they jumped up and revealed their scary skeleton fronts to the group of, now terrified, 4 year olds.
The little 'uns got a bit jumpy after that, and soon after retreated to Isabel's house for bread and soup and a VAST amount of sugar.
On the way home, a little sugar crazed, Maia stated very firmly that she didn't like the bangfires and skelingtons. We assured her that there wouldn't be any more until next year.
They were all doing fine, going from house to house and stocking up on sugary booty until...some overly enthusiastic 10 year olds jumped out at them. They had been lying face down on the pavement, and when the group approached, they jumped up and revealed their scary skeleton fronts to the group of, now terrified, 4 year olds.
The little 'uns got a bit jumpy after that, and soon after retreated to Isabel's house for bread and soup and a VAST amount of sugar.
On the way home, a little sugar crazed, Maia stated very firmly that she didn't like the bangfires and skelingtons. We assured her that there wouldn't be any more until next year.
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